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Psa 138:1-8 Of David. I will praise you, O LORD, with all my heart; before the "gods" I will sing your praise. 2 I will bow down toward your holy temple and will praise your name for your love and your faithfulness, for you have exalted above all things your name and your word. 3 When I called, you answered me; you made me bold and stouthearted. 4 May all the kings of the earth praise you, O LORD, when they hear the words of your mouth. 5 May they sing of the ways of the LORD, for the glory of the LORD is great. 6 Though the LORD is on high, he looks upon the lowly, but the proud he knows from afar. 7 Though I walk in the midst of trouble, you preserve my life; you stretch out your hand against the anger of my foes, with your right hand you save me. 8 The LORD will fulfill his purpose for me; your love, O LORD, endures forever-- do not abandon the works of your hands.(NIV)
Psa 138:1 Of David. I will praise you, O LORD, with all my heart; before the "gods" I will sing your praise.
I will praise you Lord, with every part of me. Even the divided parts of me I will train to praise you. My divided heart will be married to one another as I praise you before the idols to which I have bowed in my sin. I will also affirm you before them (the gods – Ba’al and Ashteroth, whom I had served in my homosexuality) because I have turned from my sin and have called you God. After all you have created me and deserve my praise. Though my heart is still broken, as I submit it to you in praise, you heal me and fuse the shattered parts together. And as you recreate me in your image, painstakingly (and painfully – for me!) restoring your image in me, you again deserve praise. Bless your holy Name!!
Psalm 138. 2 I will bow down toward your holy temple and will praise your name for your love and your faithfulness, for you have exalted above all things your name and your word.
Your presence draws me in worship. There where your shekinah glory resides, where your spirit dwells, that is where I will worship. And where you go, I will go, worshipping you as I go. I have reason to praise you, to desire your Presence: You love me! Imagine the Love of the most high God. Yahweh loves me! Why would I desire the paltry destructive romantic love of men? Why seek out male lovers who represent the idols I have forsaken? Here is the Creator of the universe, and he loves me!! To top it off, you are faithful! How many male lovers can I say that about? None! Not even myself, when I was still dead in my sin… yet you are faithful. You stick to me when I am ugly and when I fail, and when I myself am not faithful. Your Name in itself (YAHWEH -- I am, that I am—or “I was, am, and will forever be present, to break though into your life to save and to rescue”) testifies to your faithfulness and your love, and this name I can trust. You have placed your covenant before me, trustworthy and true. Why should I praise anybody else? You deserve it all!
Psalm 138.3 When I called, you answered me; you made me bold and stouthearted.
I was alone, and called into the darkness. You didn’t wait… immediately you came to find me there. I was afraid of what the future would hold. I was facing an intimidating future without my addictions and attractions. But you filled me with confidence. And slowly you filled me with masculinity. Boldness was something I had not known, only rebellion and manipulation. You gave me courage to forge ahead where I had no strength to go by myself. When I wanted to give in, you gave me perseverance. Just think: I am stout of heart! I am like David when faced with Goliath! Small, insignificant, but you give me not only the boldness to face my “insurmountable” (according to the world!) unwanted same-sex attraction, but also the strength of heart to go when I don’t have the physical strength to prevail. When I am tempted to see things through my broken eyes, my heart reminds me that I am more than a conqueror through you, who loves me!(Rom 8.37) Thank You!
Psalm 138.4 May all the kings of the earth praise you, O LORD, when they hear the words of your mouth.5 May they sing of the ways of the LORD, for the glory of the LORD is great.
It seems clear to me that you are the Ruler of the Universe, and your Word confirms it. As the disciples said to the Messiah, your Anointed One, "Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life.” (John 6.68) And may the authorities recognise your power over sexual and relational brokenness, since you are able to heal what they do not even recognise as an illness. You are able to forgive what they do not even recognise as a sin. And therefore I recognise your power and authority not only over the issues of my sexuality, but even over those who have declared themselves authorities over these issues, namely the various psychological associations, the various bodies of government who are legalising sin as a legitimate lifestyle, and even parts of the Church who are accepting sin as legitimate, just to pander to the spirit of this world. May all of these come to their senses and learn what they are doing to countless millions of people as they lead them to stumble even further. Speak you word of Authority Lord! Reveal to them the error of your ways, even as you speak your word to hundreds of struggling men and women daily who are faithful to your call to them to submit their sexuality to you!! Amen.
Psalm 138. 6 Though the LORD is on high, he looks upon the lowly, but the proud he knows from afar. 7 Though I walk in the midst of trouble, you preserve my life; you stretch out your hand against the anger of my foes, with your right hand you save me.
Your high vantage point, though it is intimidating in the insight it gives, at least you see things as they are: you can see how poor of heart and spirit I am. You can see that I have little to offer, but at least it enables you to treat me with compassion and mercy. It enables you to pour out your grace upon my like water on a thirsty soul. When I am down you can see it and so you can minister to me. It also means that I don’t have to pretend to you… it would do no earthly good at all, since you see right through me. And when my enemies accuse me, I can genuinely ignore them because they can tell you nothing that you don’t already know. There is such freedom and peace in that! Oh what joy to be known by you, the Most High! There is no place for pride in this equation, because it would be foolishness. But if there were, for my own sake, you see it and would discipline me. It does not serve me and so I welcome it when you show me the error of my ways, because pride gives my enemy power over me, it strengthens his hand against me. After all, it was his sin, and shouldn’t be mine as well. Preserve me from pride Lord. Let me always see my poverty. Be my God. After all, you are in heaven, and I am on earth… (Ecc 5:2 Do not be quick with your mouth, do not be hasty in your heart to utter anything before God. God is in heaven and you are on earth, so let your words be few.)
Psalm 138.8 The LORD will fulfil his purpose for me; your love, O LORD, endures forever-- do not abandon the works of your hands.
You have an eternal purpose for me. As much as for Abraham, or Adam, you have decided from before the foundations of the earth what you have in mind for me. I do not have to worry about what that purpose is, or worry that I will never achieve it, because you finish what you start. You do not give up on me and you love me no matter what! I am the work of your hands… you will never abandon me. You will see me through to wholeness. You hope for me when I do not have the strength to hope for myself. Your work of creation with me continues… I can’t wait to see it completed, but I want to enjoy the fruits as I continue. I welcome your discipline and look forward to the instalments of righteousness and peace as they come. (Heb 12:2 Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. ) Thank you Father! (Heb 12:7 Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father?)
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